“stop telling women to smile”
fine, but start telling men. actually show an invested caring about the emotional state of male strangers around you.
don’t keep indoctrinating men into considering emotion as a liability.
it is funny how a minor sign of caring is considered illegitimate because of some partial recognition of the causal source and rather than spreading the source and the benefit around- instead people decry the empathy felt for them.
and all because ’empathy is dehumanizing’. one has to be really messed up to think that people caring about you for reasons not your choosing, is their wilfull wrong of you.
that is the irony of treating others how you want to be treated, if you act and they don’t you are rejected. and if you don’t act and they do you can feel bad from empathizing the rejection. but reardless of whether you are apathetic to someone in need (‘just didn’t see them’), or whether you are empathetic to someone who wants to experiance the negativity and doesn’t want to be moved out of the pain due to how little they feel the sensation. it sucks for both sides.
that is why being egocentric on this topic is being a bigot. it is assuming everyone agrees that a certain behaviour is unacceptable thus denigrating it, and it raises up passion in the opposition who believe the opposite. egocentric paradigms competing to be the ethnic paradigm, and one of which isn’t even competing but just presuming to have won when it can’t compete, because it is just so reprehensible. and the irritating thing is the conceited presumption of victory has been accepted.
“sexy, baby, … is not my name” neither are salutations of impersonal creed like ‘hello’ or ‘hi’, but that isn’t an argument against their use. most words you use aren’t ever considered to be proper nouns let alone aliases for you specifically, what is the point? “you” isn’t your name either. also can you reasonably expect people to know your name? if so, why? an unpleasant truth is, the reason why people have to introduce themselves multiple times and often wear name tags before and until familiarity, is cause the pretence of “i look like a George” is false. and there is something regressive if you honestly think the only people who should dare address you are people you already know. we are talking matriarchy level regressive- stop with the puritan bullshit if you honestly think the puritan paradigm is degrading.
no one gets to choose what they mean to others; no one gets to choose what others consider your meaning/purpose/value- let alone which criteria they make the decision from. one can manipulate through makeup and similar pretence to try to make others share one’s view, but one doesn’t get to choose specific meanings. it is an attempt to force others to see you as you want to be seen, but only marginally fruitful. you can say “I am a X” but no one is obligated to recognize, let alone honour your preferred identity at the base level of their soul.
“women aren’t seeking your validation” i love the hyperbole with not understanding second person and human psychology. people who aren’t antisocial psychopaths actually are seeking external social validation. people are seeking friendships and interesting conversations, and metaphorical growth of spirit. also importantly, women are people. people who don’t seek any interaction, just pure isolation, are in many ways broken. as is the reasoning of hyperbolicly projecting your preference of behaviour as best practice for the species, by “advantage” to women.
the thing is the feminist utopian ideals are very bad to women if they were realized. take this sole example. imagine if all men were compelled by this and thus talked to no woman he didn’t know by name, that is literally half the population socially conspiring together to alienate a substantial portion of the population, on an arbitrary dogmatic basis. and for what? the wish of some pretentious woman who claims to represent all women?
it irritates me that the biggest protesters of an evil are general those who create the most of it. in this case bitching about rampant misogyny while actively campaigning for it to spread. if the problem is so bad, don’t out of your way to make it worse. the two faced aspect is what makes it infuriating.